Why Men Are Terrified of Smart Women

Intellectual equality disrupts the traditional power dynamic

Selithra Vayen

5 min read

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1 hour ago

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He gripped his glass when I finished my sentence. Knuckles went pale, condensation smeared across the coaster, lime peel slid down the rim like it wanted out. I’d offered a simple thought about the campaign metrics.

He laughed too loudly. Changed the subject to football. The real issue is that a woman thinking out loud still sounds like a siren to men raised on a script where they hold the answers.

Here’s what happened. A work drink in a bar that smelled like oranges and bleach. My notebook lay open, a small coffee ring on the corner of the page. He asked what I thought, eyebrows up, pen poised. I told him. Numbers, context, one tidy strategy.

He clicked the pen. Once. Twice. The click found a rhythm that said shut up without saying shut up. I sipped flat soda and watched his jaw flex. You know the look. Smile on the lips, retreat in the eyes. That’s when it clicked for me. He wanted my mind until my mind disagreed with his.

The small tells

I met this fear in school halls and meeting rooms and date tables. A boy in debate class misquoted a source, then accused me of “memorizing too much.” The fluorescent light flickered, and my knees shook…