What Nobody Tells You About Turning 65

Then they smack you in the face with a backhand

3 min read

1 hour ago

Never mind becoming invisible, your lower back aching for no good reason, energy fizzling before the day is done, and that there is no such thing as a handsome comfortable shoe.

What nobody tells you is that as you approach the big — no, not the 5-Oh! or the 6–Oh! — but the 65-Oh!!, corporations will harangue and blast you with the message, “you’re old!” And they don’t let you forget what they think of you for a single day.

The AARP wants you for a member. Every health insurer and all of big pharma want a piece of the Medicare mega money ball through you, being suggestive as to what might, could, is secretly, or probably-will-pretty-soon ail you.

You get calls from sympathetically clucking individuals, waving “in-home health assessments” under your nose as if they were dessert carts in a Michelin Star restaurant, or a fruit basket on the way to your house. “Are you sure you’re still ambulatory? Because we can come to you!”

One minute, you were aging nicely, the next you’re painted fragile and febrile. It’s enough to give you a complex!

First, the culture doesn’t talk about aging at all as if it only happened to an irrelevant few, then it won’t shut up about it!