Psychology Today | 07.05.2026 19:12The Alien Self, as described by Fonagy and Bateman, is a detested, disavowed, disowned part of the self that arises out of trauma. Early neglect or abuse can lead a child to feel as if they are an undesirable or unworthy being. Caregivers not grasping, or even having disdain for, a child's natural leanings, can also create an Alien Self. Because it is not welcome or celebrated, the child seals off an authentic identity. Because they were not embraced, they do not embrace themselves.
